Rough

Last night was rough.  I don't think I've felt that bad so far.  My whole body ached.  My stomach was just not right.  I tried to sleep, but sleeping is so hard.  I called my mom just to cry.  This is really hard.  I wish there was an easy way to kill cancer.  I wish cancer didn't exist.  This morning was really hard too.  I tried to help get Ashlyn ready and then I went back to bed.  I'm just tired.  I don't feel as bad this morning, but I'm so emotional.  My hair is on it's last leg.  Hair is everywhere.  I thought getting it cut short would help, but it's still everywhere.  It's covering my pillow and my sink and my bathroom floor.  I know it shouldn't be, but losing my hair is one of the hardest things for me so far.  I'm not really a vain person, but losing my hair makes me feel sick.  It's a reminder when I look in the mirror that I'm in the middle of a battle.  I'm a strong person and I know tomorrow will be better...but today is kinda rough.  I've reminded myself several times today that my battle will end with victory!  My hair will grow back and I'll be cancer FREE!  I will continue to praise God through this storm and I know He's with me every step of the way.  He didn't promise it would be easy...He only promised I wouldn't be alone.